Stand-Up

Last week, Joe and I were walking towards Burns Court Theater to grab some dinner before the movie when we heard yelling in the distance.  As we approached we noticed a group of protesters (mostly female) holding up posters of aborted fetuses.  It was sick sad irony that at the time I was craving spaghetti and meatballs.

Surprisingly, the yelling was coming from a woman facing the protesters, who was shouting "I don't need to see pictures of dead babies when I am going to the movies!" to which one of them (a man) said back to her, "Then stop killing babies."

We walked on, and while I ruminated on whether or not this man knew this woman was NOT in fact the head of the Baby-Killing campaign, another normal-looking woman extended a pamphlet to us, which we politely declined.  I watched as more people busily avoided eye contact with the protesters as we made our way to the restaurant.

On our way back, the rain had begun again and fewer people were walking around.  However the protesters remained, some still holding their babies under an umbrella.  Just as we were entering the theater, I heard one of them call out, "Abortion isn't funny", to which I so cleverly replied, "Yeah, but life is."  I don't really know what I meant, but it was the first thing that came to mind.

The film they were protesting is called "Obvious Child," starring Jenny Slate (whom I think I recognize from "The Kroll Show") and Jake Lacy (from the later seasons of "The Office).  Slate plays Donna, a twenty-something stand-up comic who finds herself dumped, jobless, and pregnant by a nice young man, Max (Lacy), who also happens to be her professor mother's best student.  It's an honest take on the ridiculous curve balls life throws and Slate is simultaneously vulnerable and hysterical as she maneuvers her way through. 

The most poignant scene is, not shockingly, when Donna goes to have the abortion.  After discussing with her mother and best friend, both of whom reveal their own experiences, the topic becomes less demonizing and isolating.  Max joins her for her appointment, staying by her side until she is taken into the procedure room, and then again as she's recuperating in her apartment.  Lying on her back, her eyes glassy from an anesthetic, there was a small part of me that was waiting for her to stop the operation; not in a hopeful way, but just in an expectant way.  But just as her eyes close, (spoiler alert) the scene cuts to her sitting in a recovery room with several other women, quietly sipping their beverages.  Donna gazes around the room and shares a glance with a young woman sitting next to her and they exchange a comforting smile, and you feel their acceptance and peace right along with them.  

Although the issue of abortion was a key subject in the story, I truly felt the main focus of the film was on something much more universal and relatable, especially now as I crossed over into my 30s; growing up, and specifically, making the transition into adulthood.  The changes often happen drastically and are unapologetically rough during this part of our lives, and its all any of us can do to just make the best decisions with the choices we have. 

I was thinking about this even as we walked out of the theater, excitedly discussing the themes and completely oblivious to any protesters that hung on outside.  And it seems pertinent now since the Supreme Court ruled in favor of Hobby Lobby's refusal to cover certain forms of birth control.

I could go into another whole blog post about my rage with that whole thing, but rather than be another voice that can be shouted down with statistics and Bible verses, I think I'd prefer to behave like the women in film did (and unlike the protesters); with quiet dignity.  Because the truth is, it's never been easy to be a woman and I fear it never will be.  And in a small way, it's gotten even harder now.  This small step chips away at our doctors and our own ability to make the best health choices for our bodies, having to choose between cost and diagnosis.

I fear it will continue to be eroded until it is accepted that we can be trusted with our own bodies, having known them since birth.  And until we understand that it is not God, or the government or each other that we must answer to, but to ourselves.  We understand that whatever choice we make, we live with, no one else.  And there's a comforting freedom in that.

But that's just me.  And that's ok.

Anyway, I better go for now.  I need to head over to protest the new Michael Bay movie.  Wonder if I can borrow one of those abortion posters...